Remembering One Year Ago {Part 2}

*To respect Ava's privacy and the privacy of her sweet birthmother, specific details of her 'story' will be limited* 

Meeting Ava's Birthmother 

   It felt like forever, but Sunday afternoon finally did come! :) Not sure about Sunday road construction plans and not wanting to be late for our appointment, we left earlier than necessary (for those of you who know me well, this should not surprise you ;) ). Since we arrived early, we decided to do some quick 'window shopping' at the nearby Target before our appointment -- looking at all things PINK! :)

   Finally the time came to meet Ava's birthmother. I remember saying to Tim before we got out of the car, "I feel like she's the one!" This is where adoption is difficult (the paperwork was a breeze!) -- reality sets in. You are super excited (and nervous!) to meet a birthmother, but at the same time, you can't help but think of what she's really doing -- she's choosing parents for the baby she is carrying!! It's very tough to be excited about what could be your baby (in a few short weeks!), while also realizing that if it is, that same baby will be her greatest loss. I've often referred to adoption as a "joy and sorrow interwoven" experience for this reason.

   I've heard that the first time you meet someone special, it's hard to forget. I agree, and in this case, it was also an experience I can hardly put into words. I hope I never forget what it was like to finally meet Ava's birthmother for the first time. She greeted us with smiles and hugs! And her adorable baby bump...!

   At this point, she had 'chosen' us, not by anything officially binding, but in her heart. I remember early in the conversation, she told us that. We chatted for a couple hours; she shared pictures and videos of her family, and offered us an ultrasound picture of Ava. We discussed baby names, nursery colors, our families and close friends, interests and hobbies, beliefs and values, favorite vacations, how we chose adoption, her pregnancy, jobs, education, hopes and dreams, and childhood memories. We really "clicked"! I felt like we could be great friends!!

   Some people have asked about Ava's name. So, let me back up. In our conversation about baby names, Ava's birthmother asked if she could have some input in that. At this point in our adoption journey, we had been told that since we weren't gender specific (meaning we didn't have a preference of baby's gender), we would most likely have a boy. They seemed to be outnumbering the girls during that time! ;) So, we had, at least mentally, prepared for all things BLUE -- including a name. :) However, we had not settled on a girl's name. When she asked if we liked the name "Ava", we both excitedly agreed that we did (and thanks for helping us narrow down our list!!). :) And, how very special to share with Ava some day!! As for the middle name, we had less than 3 weeks to figure that out. ;) --more about this later--

  As our meeting drew to a close, the decision whether we would officially "match" felt very clear to me.  I felt very much at peace that this was a "match". This is another time when adoption can be difficult. We had been told that nothing is a "sealed deal" until everything is signed and official. I wanted to respect her decision and felt like giving her some additional time  (she had just met us, after all!) might help her also be at peace with whatever decision she made. However, as we were saying our goodbyes, she hugged me and said, "I still choose ya'll. I know you will be great parents!"... those words resinate in my mind still today. From that moment on, I never had any doubt about her changing her mind about placing the baby or choosing us for the parents. I feel like only God could've given this measure of peace. --more about this later--
 
  The wait for Ava's arrival began...