Remembering One Year Ago {Part 5}

*To respect Ava's privacy and the privacy of her sweet birthmother, specific details of her 'story' will be limited* 

Meeting Baby Ava

   We finally got the call that Ava had arrived! Our poor birthmother, in labor for almost 2 full days! I was so proud of her though, she was a rockstar in l&d. And our little Ava was perfect ~ all 7lbs 11.5oz of her! :)

   Our sweet caseworker had literally been working around the clock for the past several days. When she called to tell us Ava had been born, she told us she was going to sleep for 2 hours then meet us at the hospital but that we were welcome to go anytime. Of course, we couldn't wait a minute longer, so we grabbed a quick breakfast and off we went!! (And, by the time we got to the hospital, our caseworker was there also. Have I mentioned how wonderful our caseworkers were?! They were simply the best!)

Sunrise the day Ava was born

    When we arrived at the hospital, after checking in we were told that our baby was in the nursery, and that "Heather was taking care of your baby - giving her a bath, etc" and we would be given a room soon...short on sleep and full of excitement to meet our baby, this comment caught me by surprise. The nurse said it like we were supposed to know who Heather was. I immediately thought of my sister, Heather. It was very special to think of "Heather" taking care of our baby! Later, we got to meet Nurse Heather. Turns out, she was the Nurse Manager, and she never does this particular job anymore, but was today because she was filling in for someone who called out sick. We told her about Ava's auntie Heather, and how special it was that she was caring for our Ava that morning. Tearfully, she said she would never forget our story, and we assured her we wouldn't forget her either!

Last picture as a family of 2!

    Here we are, meeting baby Ava for the first time. The feeling of meeting your baby for the first time is surreal!! Love at first sight!!

   The next day and a half was spent cuddling and loving on Ava. We were thankful to have a private room at the hospital. Really, it was perfect timing - they had just renovated the NICU, so we got the "old" NICU room all to ourselves! The nursing staff was absolutely one the kindest group of nurses I've ever met.

   We left the hospital Sunday after we got the "ok" to go by the pediatrician on call. We arrived home to find that my family had come over earlier that day and decorated our home with balloons, flowers, and baby gifts! Miss Ava had a warm welcome by all (including the boys)!! Later that afternoon we had several visitors to meet Miss Ava Kate!

Our first family picture at home (HannahSwede Photography)

Ava resting after arriving home (HannahSwede Photography)

At Home with Baby Ava

     Since Ava was born in GA, the adoption laws (simplified) go like this: the birthmother can sign her rights over 24 hours after the birth of the child, then has a 10-day revocation window in which she can essentially change her mind. This "waiting period" is much shorter in some states (some are only 24 hours, and some immediately after signing) and much longer in others (up to 30 days). 10 days can seem like a long time to "know for sure" this baby is yours. Sometimes, "cradle care" is used in an effort to avoid the adoptive parents getting attached to a baby that in the end may go back to the birth family.

     So! For 10 days after Ava's birthmother signed, we were asked almost daily, and sometimes hourly, if we had any doubt that her birthmother would change her mind and decide to parent. I know for a fact that there were friends and family who feared, worried, wondered, and prayed about this. However...not once did I fear, worry, or doubt about her changing her mind. I knew in my heart the outcome. I had much peace that Baby Ava was ours. I remember being asked one day, "How many more days??"...to which I replied honestly, "for what?" I simply hadn't even thought about the countdown. It is amazing the power of peace.

   I plan to do a post some day on Things I Learned from Adoption, but I'll share one thing now. By far, the hardest part of Ava's adoption was the realization that our greatest joy was her birthmother's greatest loss. For some reason, this never hit me until after we met our birthmother, and was even stronger after Ava was born. Maybe it became more real having a face, name, and story with "birthmother". After Ava was born, I remember late night/early morning feedings holding her and just sobbing -- imaging what her birthmother must be feeling, wondering how she was doing, and wishing I could over and over thank her for choosing us. Every time I looked at Ava, I saw her birthmother in her and it literally made my heart hurt. For the first few months, and even to this day, I occasionally check on her. She's one of the bravest and strongest women I know, and I hope she realizes that. What a wonderful gift she gave us!!!

   Again, thank you all for your love and support for us, Ava, and her adoption!